The lifestyle of my dog

Since I became a daddy I've been getting kinda flabby Clothes don't fit me like they used to Jeans ain't getting any looser But you still love and hug me Even though I'm getting tubby Can't get your arms around me 'Cause of my distended belly But there's another guy who's gone and caught your eye See him standing in the garden Hair smooth, shiny and golden He be puffing out his chest like he's the goddamn best Come strutting through the kitchen Like he thinks that I don't see him But it won't be playing on my mind He's the four-legged kind Wish I could be the one On my back there in the sun She can rub my belly slowly Stroke my head and always hold me A gift from God above Everyone I meet I love That's the living that I want The lifestyle of my dog When I take him out a-walking I can't stop the ladies talking He's peacocking in the park Swear he's gonna break some hearts 'Til he gets a case of zoomies Starts circling like a loony Swooning turns to laughs When he starts to drag his ass But that's just the life in his kingdom Zero shame and total freedom My boy is quite the looker Every female poodle's future And somehow he still sleeps all day While I go work and earn his pay Wish I could be the one On my back there in the sun She can rub my belly slowly Stroke my head and always hold me A gift from God above Everyone I meet I love That's the living that I want The lifestyle of my dog No bills, no stress No emails to address No alarm at half past five Just tennis balls and belly rubs for life Meanwhile I'm sat paying tax While he's asleep upon his back Honestly, I gotta let you know I think the dog has cracked the code Wish I could be the one Rolling 'round there in the sun No bad moods or hidden grudges Just treats and walks and sofa cuddles A gift from God above Living every day in love That's the living that I want The lifestyle of my dog